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We the human race have the most ridiculous tendency: we zero in on our differences, enlarge them to epic proportions, and harp upon them--pick-pick-pick, lecture-lecture-lecture, obsess-obsess-obsess--until bringing about an argument, freeze-out, or war. And we usually don't stop after that, either. We just lather, rinse, and repeat. It's part of the need to belong to a group, a tribe; and I know it will never go away. But I also think it's taken way too far, way down to laughably small details--or rather, they would be laughable, if they didn't result in tears, blood, and death.

Religious schisms are the obvious example. There's the famous joke where two people exchange views, agreeing on everything at first--"I'm a Christian." "Me too!" "Protestant." "Me too!" "Baptist." "Me too!" "Second Baptist Church of Christ of Louisiana." "Oh. I'm First Baptist of Missouri. Die, sacrilegious scum!" I don't have to point to specific instances regarding the Catholic Church right now. You've seen it on your own f-list.

And it goes all the way down to personal relationship level, which is really where I think it's idiotic. People who have 99% of everything in common, and know each other extremely well, will spend 50% of their time arguing about that 1% difference. I'm getting tired of it. It's extraordinarily stupid, and predictable, and nothing exasperates me faster than predictable stupidity. No, we'll never find someone who's 100% perfect in our eyes. It's a sad fact--but then again, 99%, or even 90%, is pretty good. People's quirks and preferences, ones you may never quite understand, are what make them individuals, and are part of what drew you to them. Radio host Chris, in one of his thoughtful rambles on "Northern Exposure," observed with regret, "When we win the woman of our dreams, the first thing we do is try to change her." It's true (for both sexes), and it should not be that way--not for lovers, and not for friends either.

Oh, I've done it too. I know I have. "I thought I liked you until I found out you didn't care for the LOTR movie. There is no trust between us now." "You prefer sweet pickles to dill? Get out of this house; out!"

But I'm trying not to. Call it part of my New Year's resolution, which was to stay out of internet debates; or call it an attempt to keep my stress level down (because stress ages you unnaturally fast, and I want to hang onto my girlish looks).

So. Comment below if you want me to name something I like about you, despite it not being a feature I'm interested in having myself.

And me? Is there anything you admire or like about me even though it's different from the way you'll ever be? (No biological traits, now. That's silly.) Speak up. Get over here onto this common ground.

We'll crush the infidels later this afternoon, when we've had some tea and a few good laughs.

Comments

modmerseygirl
Apr. 20th, 2005 11:27 pm (UTC)
*applauds* Marvelous post, Miss M. :-) You know I love ya! *hugs*

Well, I'd love to have my ego boosted this evening, so if there's anything you'd like to say, I'd enjoy reading it. ;-)

I think you're an amazing writer, a terrific music-recommender and an even better LJ buddy. I'm so thankful that our paths crossed! You're a marvelous lady and a real blessing to know. Hopefully we'll get to meet in person someday and chat for hours over coffee.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Molly}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} <3
mollyringle
Apr. 21st, 2005 07:39 am (UTC)
Thank you, Miz K. :)

Well, aside from all your great music recommendations and fandom discussions, which are interests we *do* have in common, I really admire your positive attitude and sweetness. Me, I'm so sarcastic that it's become second nature, and I tend to offend people without even meaning to. Heh. So though I don't know how you do it, I think it's awesome that you keep such an upbeat attitude--even if it's just a front. ;) Also, even though I've been lazy about getting a religion, I admire that you are so secure and happy in yours. Your friends and family are lucky to know you. Wish I were closer for coffee! (And I'd like to have a look at that Starbucks guy...)
modmerseygirl
Apr. 21st, 2005 09:28 am (UTC)
Aww, thank you so much, Molly! *sniffles* You're a gem. :-) I feel undeserving of those words, but thank you! You really made my day brighter.

Love yas!
mollyringle
Apr. 21st, 2005 06:15 pm (UTC)
Silly girl, of course you're worthy. :) But I'm glad you had a brighter day, all the same!