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Condensed parody version

Yes! I saw The Two Towers. And yes! I loved it.

But before I write a "real" review--assuming I ever do; I mean, don't you guys have enough of those on your friends lists right now?--I give you this, a parody version of the script. Condensed of course. And subject to being very wrong in terms of chronology, since I've only seen the movie once so far.

Spoilers on EVERYTHING, and lots of lame slash-implication jokes. Read on if you dareCollapse )


( 578 comments — Leave a comment )
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Feb. 24th, 2003 11:00 am (UTC)
i love this and have sent tons of people here who all though it was great to. ur just jelous cuz im pretty is by far the best though. also one little thing that is bugging me. it says i hear white is the new black but gandalf wasnt black, he was grey. but other than that, ive some other parody and they were nothing compared to this
Mar. 1st, 2003 10:37 pm (UTC)
i loved this!!! i just wanted to know if you did one like this for th fellowship of the ring.....
Mar. 2nd, 2003 10:03 am (UTC)
Kind of... there's a slash-parody version here...

Glad you liked this. :)
Mar. 3rd, 2003 09:59 am (UTC)
LEGOLAS: No! This is unbearable! I almost had ANOTHER facial expression!
LMAO! That was hilarious! You should write more. You're good at it. Tee!. . .Captain Obvious. . .
Mar. 4th, 2003 03:44 am (UTC)
I know you probably need another comment like you need a hole in the head, but I just wanted to say that this is the best laugh I've had in a good, long time! Thanks!
Mar. 6th, 2003 08:42 pm (UTC)
GOD. That is SO funny!
I like the references to how the movie differs from the book!
Mar. 7th, 2003 05:08 pm (UTC)
u dont kno me but this is great!!!!!!! a million and one ppl have told u already, but seriously, it is!!!! loved the galadriel/elrond/gandalf three-way telepathy calling thing, lol
Mar. 8th, 2003 05:33 pm (UTC)
aelyn showed me this post. I have never laughed so hard. XD That was rich! Thank you for making my day even better. ^____^
Mar. 8th, 2003 08:17 pm (UTC)
You're welcome, and thank you. Glad it's still being passed around!
Mar. 9th, 2003 05:19 am (UTC)
This was Hilarious. The Aragorn Specail Shoulder Sqeeze! lmao
Mar. 9th, 2003 03:13 pm (UTC)
</i>GANDALF: Do you have me on three-way telepathy calling? I hate that.
ELROND: Yeah, sorry. I was talking to Galadriel. Hey, didn't you die or something?
GANDALF: No, you twit. Now quit gossiping and listen. There's a war about to start at Helm's Deep.
GALADRIEL: Yeah, and?
GANDALF: And they need your help, moron.
GALADRIEL: (exaggerated sigh) Fine, whatever. I'll send Haldir or something. He's expendable.</i>

You nailed the book, and Legolas is quite the Captain Obvious. This was hilarious, great job. ^^ Love the comments from people that read the book.
Mar. 10th, 2003 01:29 pm (UTC)
Must send this to EVERYONE
*wheezes with laughter* My friend sent me the link to this place... Most hilarious thing EVER. After this, watching the Two Towers will never be the same again!

*giggles* Nassssty kinky Hobbitssesss
Mar. 22nd, 2003 07:12 pm (UTC)
Laughing my ass off over here!! *wipes away tear*
OMG!! That's HILARIOUS!! ^^ I'm sending it to my LOTR friends (184 of 'em!) ;) I love reading this over and over again- I have it posted on my locker! My favs are:

ARAGORN: Hi. You handle pointy things very well.

EOWYN: Yes. My only fear is dying a virgin. Hint, hint.

LEGOLAS: You're just jealous because I'm pretty.

ARAGORN: You're just jealous because I'm going to be king.

LEGOLAS: You can bite my ass.

ARAGORN: Hey, blow me.

(Ten minutes later)

LEGOLAS: I didn't mean that.

ARAGORN: It's okay. Me neither.

LEGOLAS: Kiss and make up?

ARAGORN: How about I squeeze your shoulder in a very special way?\

LMAO! I make fun of Legolas/Aragorn and Sam/Frodo in the exact same way!! You are my savior!! *bows before you* DAMN THAT'S GOOD STUFF! :)
Thanks you SO much for doing that and PLEAAAAASSSSSSEEEEEE will you do the same for RotK? PWEASE? This is always good for a laugh! ;)

Mar. 29th, 2003 10:29 pm (UTC)
You must be tired of this, especially if you still have e-mail notation turned on. Still, I have to comment. This is bloody HILARIOUS. I don't laugh out loud often, but I was still bursting into giggles randomly long after I'd finished reading. It *rocks*.
Apr. 2nd, 2003 06:34 pm (UTC)
Uh. . .K
On a different note from the 100% of everyone else saying it was hilarious, I wasted 5 minutes of my day staring blankly, reading what is supposed to be intended as humor. lol
Apr. 9th, 2003 06:37 am (UTC)
-- -- -- --
Smashing. ;) Thanks for the morning laugh and a half.
Apr. 19th, 2003 04:58 am (UTC)
SAM: We will fight them in the towers, we shall fight them on the plains, we shall..


SAM: Never in the field of fantasy wars has so much been owed by so many to so few..


SAM: Incedentally this movie will be out on DVD and Video casette on the 7th of august...


===And, not forgetting===


ELROND: Whatcha doin?

GALADRIEL: Watchin' the game, drinkin' a bud...

ELROND: True, true..




GANDALF: WAZZZZZZURRRRRRRRRRRRPPPP!!!! hey legolas, pick up the telepathic link!




(they continue in this way for several hours)
Apr. 20th, 2003 04:40 pm (UTC)
Re: XD
Hehehe...nice additions. :) I really should have had Legolas pick up the link...
Re: XD - deathbringer - Apr. 23rd, 2003 06:59 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: XD - deathbringer - Apr. 25th, 2003 04:46 am (UTC) - Expand
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( 578 comments — Leave a comment )

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