I do not ask this question idly. Next week I'm due to get filmed by Art Zone, a local show that discovered me via the Bulwer-Lytton contest. They're now being kind enough to have me read the winning sentence and then promote whatever else I'd like to promote.
So, uh...eek! What do I say or do to charm the world? Or at least the local viewership? Ideas? And how do I make sure my hair will look okay?
(One thing I want to be sure to elucidate is the fact that I wrote the Bulwer-Lytton sentence to be bad intentionally, and that it is not the first line of any of my novels. You'd be surprised how many people don't grasp that.)